Blink的笔记(6)

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  第29页

  吉赛赛

  The first is what I call a positive sentiment override, where positive emotion overrides irritability. It's like a buffer. one party will do something bad and the other will say,"she's in a crummy mood". Or they can be in negative sentiment override, so that even a relatively neutral thing that one party says gets perceived as negative. In the negative sentiment override, people dra... (更多)

  The first is what I call a positive sentiment override, where positive emotion overrides irritability. It's like a buffer. one party will do something bad and the other will say,"she's in a crummy mood".

  Or they can be in negative sentiment override, so that even a relatively neutral thing that one party says gets perceived as negative. In the negative sentiment override, people draw lasting conclusions about each other. If one party does something positive, it's selfish person doing a positive thing.

  It's really hard to change those states, and those states determines whether one party tries to repair things, the other party sees that as repair or hostile manipulation.

  For example:

  "I'm talking with her and she says,‘will you shut up and let me finish?’

  In positive sentiment override I say,'Sorry, go ahead.' - I'm not very happy, but I recognize the repair. In negative sentiment override I say, 'To hell with you, I'm not getting a chance to finish either. You are such a bitch. You remind me of your mother.' "

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  2011-03-04 12:03:16   回应

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  第32页

  Teresa

  He has found that he can find out much of what he needs to know just by focusing on what he calls the Four horsemen: defensiveness, stonewalling, criticism, and contempt. Even within the Four Horsemen, in fact, there is one emotion that he considers the most important of all: contempt. ... "You would think that criticism would be the worst," Gottman syas, "because criticism is a ... (更多)

  He has found that he can find out much of what he needs to know just by focusing on what he calls the Four horsemen: defensiveness, stonewalling, criticism, and contempt. Even within the Four Horsemen, in fact, there is one emotion that he considers the most important of all: contempt. ... "You would think that criticism would be the worst," Gottman syas, "because criticism is a global condemnation of a person's chracter. Yet contempt is qualitatively different from criticism. With criticism I might say to my wife, "You never listen, you are really selfish and insensitive." Well, she's going to respond defensively to that. That's not good for our problem solving and itneraction. But if I speak from a superior plane, that's far more damaging, and contempt is any statement made from a higher level. A lot of time it's an insult: 'You are a bitch. You're scum.' It's trying to put that person on a lower plane than you. It's hierarchical."

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  2012-05-13 03:48:06   回应

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  第145页

  我

  Deliberate-thinking is a wonderful tool when we have the luxury of time, the help of a computer, and a clearly defined task, and the fruits of that type of analysis can set the stage for rapid cognition....the second lesson is that in good decision making, frugality matters...reduce it to simplest patterns...less is more...To be a good decision maker, we have to edit. (更多)

  Deliberate-thinking is a wonderful tool when we have the luxury of time, the help of a computer, and a clearly defined task, and the fruits of that type of analysis can set the stage for rapid cognition....the second lesson is that in good decision making, frugality matters...reduce it to simplest patterns...less is more...To be a good decision maker, we have to edit.

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  2012-02-01 22:35:40   回应

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  第144页

  我

  Bob Golomb is a great car salesman because he is very good, in the moment, at intuiting the intentions and needs and emotions of his customers. But he is also a great salesman because he understands when to put the brakes on that process: when to consciously resist a particular kind of snap judgment. (更多)

  Bob Golomb is a great car salesman because he is very good, in the moment, at intuiting the intentions and needs and emotions of his customers. But he is also a great salesman because he understands when to put the brakes on that process: when to consciously resist a particular kind of snap judgment.

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  2012-02-01 22:33:40   回应

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  The Theory of Thin Slices

  Eraechoin (地支，支者犹树之枝也。)

  People began making necessary adjustments long before they were consciously aware of what adjustments they were supposed to be making. The adaptive unconscious is not to be confused with the unconscious described by Sigmund Freud, which was a dark and murky place filled with desires and memories and fantasies that were too disturbing for us to think about consciously. Judging people's perso... (更多)

  People began making necessary adjustments long before they were consciously aware of what adjustments they were supposed to be making.

  The adaptive unconscious is not to be confused with the unconscious described by Sigmund Freud, which was a dark and murky place filled with desires and memories and fantasies that were too disturbing for us to think about consciously.

  Judging people's personalities is a really good example of how surprisingly effective thin-slicing can be.

  看着看着就入神了，谁还来摘词句啊大哥！！ (收起)

  2012-01-13 13:33:50   回应

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  第59页

  映日星 (星辉微茫 可映日月)

  Damasio studied patients with damage to a small but critical part of the brain called the ventromedial prefrontal cortex, which lies behind the nose...People with damage to their ventromedial area are perfectly rational.They can be highly intelligent and functional, but the lack judgment. More precisely, they don't have that mental valet in their unconscious that frees them up to concentrate on wh... (更多)

  Damasio studied patients with damage to a small but critical part of the brain called the ventromedial prefrontal cortex, which lies behind the nose...People with damage to their ventromedial area are perfectly rational.They can be highly intelligent and functional, but the lack judgment. More precisely, they don't have that mental valet in their unconscious that frees them up to concentrate on what really matters.

  如果这是真的，“善谋不善断”就不只是性格问题而是生理缺陷了…… behind the nose——我的鼻子确实不大好。。。 (收起)

  2011-02-24 01:50:33   回应

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