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all i really wanted was to try and live the life that was so spontaneously welling up within me. Why was that so very difficult?
Only the thoughts that we live out have any value

of introspection
in just such a way the leaves fall around a tree in autumn; the tree doesn't feel it, the rain trickles down it, or sunshine, or frost, and within it life slowly retreats into its narrowest, inmost recess. It doesn't dies. It waits
Rather, it's the same indivisible godhead that is active in us and in nature; and if the outside wold were to perish, any one of us would be capable of reconstructing it, because mountain and river, tree and leaf, root and blossom, every form in nature, has a pre-image inside us; it originates from the soul, whose nature is eternity, whose nature we don't know but is generally revealed to us as the power of love and creativity

and here comes my favorite paragraph (and the essence as well) of the book:
There was no duty for enlightened people, none, none, except this: to seek themselves, to become certain of themselves, to grope forward along their own path, wherever it might lead. I had dreamt of roles that might be meant for me, as a poet, perhaps, or as a prophet, or as a painter, or whatever else. That was all meaningless. I didn't exist to write poetry, to preach sermons, to paint pictures; neither I nor anyone else existed for that business; in the long run, it was irrelevant. His business was to discover his own destiny, not just any destiny, and to live it totally and undividedly. Anything else was just a half-measure, an attempt to run away, an escape back to the ideal of the masses, an adaptation, fear of one's own nature.

译文 
“我常常幻想未来的景象，梦想自己可能会成为的角色，或许是诗人、预言者、画家等等。然而这些都不算什么。我存在的意义并不是为了写诗、预言或作画，任何人生存的意义都不应是这些。这些只是旁枝末节。对每个人而言，真正的职责只有一个：找到自我。无论他的归宿是诗人还是疯子，是先知还是罪犯——这些其实与他无关，毫不重要。他的职责只是找到自己的命运——而不是他人的命运——然后在心中坚守其一生，全心全意，永不停息。所有其他的路都是不完整的，是人的逃避方式，是对大众理想的懦弱回归，是随波逐流，是对内心的恐惧。新的境界在我心中冉冉升起，森然，神圣，我曾无数次有模糊的预感，甚至还曾将其以语言道出，但直到此刻，我才真正体会了它的意思。我是自然的尝试，是自然向未知世界迈进的一次尝试，或许它会打开新境界，或许会一无所成，然而，让这一尝试从远古的深渊中诞生，让我的心感受到它的意志，并将其转换为我的意志，这就是我的天职！”

of spiritual love (by Lady Eve)
Love must have the strength to reach certainty for itself. Then it no longer undergoes the power of attraction, but exerts it.