与之对应的英文原文是:
……prudence (in all things a virtue, in politics, the first of virtues) will lead us rather to acquiesce in some qualified plan, that does not come up to the full perfection of the abstract idea, than to push for the more perfect, which cannot be attained without tearing to pieces the whole contexture of the commonwealth……
对照阅读过的感受是,译文很难讲是很通顺的,意思勉强算是准确。
与之对应的英文原文是:
……in all changes in the state, moderation is a virtue, not only amiable but powerful. It is a disposing, arranging, conciliating, cementing virtue……
把moderation翻译成中庸很难说错,但是仍然有些别扭,我个人觉得翻译为稳健更妥帖。而此书将disposing一词翻译作“精心选择的”是很难讲得通的,查各个版本的词典的释义都没有这种解释。个人觉得翻译作“决定性”较妥当,出自ODE:
- [intrans.] LITERARY determine the course of events: the city proposed, but the unions disposed. <ORIGIN> from the proverb ‘Man proposes, (but) God disposes,’ translating Latin Homo proponit, sed Deus disponit (Thomas à Kempis's De Imitatione Christ I. xix).
为了排比效果,之后的几个词,arranging, conciliating, cementing分别译作“调解性”、“安抚性”、“巩固性”似乎更可取。
与之对应的英文原文是:
This virtue of moderation (which times and situations will clearly distinguish from the counterfeits of pusillanimity and indecision) is the virtue only of superior minds. It requires a deep courage, and full of reflection, to be temperate when the voice of multitudes (the specious mimic of fame and reputation) passes judgment against you. The impetuous desire of an unthinking public will endure no course, but what conducts to splendid and perilous extremes. Then, to dare to be fearful, when all about you are full of presumption and confidence, and when those who are bold at the hazard of others would punish your caution and disaffection, is to show a mind prepared for its trial; it discovers, in the midst of general levity, a self-possessing and collected character, which, sooner or later, bids fair to attract every thing to it, as to a centre.
“显然不同于”处漏译了“which times and situations will clearly distinguish”,即“不同于”是因为“times and situations”的考验使得这个virtue不同于pusillanimity和indecision,而且原文里也没有“显然”的意思。“the specious mimic of fame and reputation”也被漏译。
而“缺乏思想的公众意志往往表现为一种狂暴急切的要求,这种要求转眼即逝不会长久,那是一种显而易见的危险的极端的行动”一句也很难说是翻译准确了。该句对应原文是“The impetuous desire of an unthinking public will endure no course, but what conducts to splendid and perilous extremes”,应该是:“缺乏思想的公众们狂热冲动的诉求只可能与宏大极端为导向的行动主张相容。”此句的原文里也没有“显而易见”的意思。
接下来的一句话里的“when those who are bold at the hazard of others would punish your caution and disaffection”被翻译成“当那些拿人的生命作儿戏的人使你谨慎和冷静时”,其中的“punish”完全被翻译错了,怎么可能会是“使你…”呢?“disaffection”翻译成“冷静”也不对。所以这句话应该是:“当某些自身的鲁莽置他人于险境之徒要因你的谨慎和疏离惩罚你时”。
最后一句话“it discovers, in the midst of general levity, a self-possessing and collected character”的译文中的“会发现”又是一个翻译错误,此处不是“发现”的意思,是“display”(展现、显示,算是个archaic的用法,可参考韦氏学院词典11版第1个解释中的b项)的意思。所以不是“在普遍的轻率与浮躁中,会发现这样的头脑存在着…”,而是“在普遍的轻率与浮躁中,这样的头脑展现出…”。另外“bids fair to”的“To appear likely”的意思也被漏译了。
最后值得一提的是,这三段话分布在该文的倒数第五和第三段里,是译者拣选着翻译的,若是在三句长话间加入省略号会更好。没加倒也无可厚非,可惜翻译质量得实在是有些对不起读者。