Sunny对《The Course of Love》的笔记(4)

The Course of Love
  • 书名: The Course of Love
  • 作者: Alain de Botton
  • 副标题: A Novel
  • 页数: 240
  • 出版社: Simon & Schuster
  • 出版年: 2016-6-14
  • 第22页
    Love reaches a pitch at those moments when our beloved turns out to understand, more early than others have ever been able to, and perhaps even better than we do ourselves, the chaotic embarrassing, and shameful parts of us. That someone else gets who we are and both sympathizes with us an forgives us for what they see underpins our whole capacity to trust and to give. Love is dividend of gratitude fro our lover's insight into our own confused and troubled psyche. 
    2016-07-21 08:28:07 回应
  • 第41页
    To a shameful extent, the charm of marriage boils down to how unpleasant it is to be alone. Society as a whole appears determined to render the single state as nettlesome and depressing as possible: once the freewheeling days of school and university are over, company and warmth become dispiritingly hard to find.
    Marriage: a hopeful, generous, infinitely kind gamble taken by two people who don't know yet who they are or who the other might be, binding themselves to a future they cannot conceive of and have carefully omitted to investigate.
    We do not need to be constantly reasonable in order to have good relationships; all we need to have mastered is the occasional capacity to acknowledge with good grace that we may, in one or two areas, be somewhat insane.
    2016-07-21 08:55:49 回应
  • 第90页
    The world upsets, disappoints, frustrates, and hurts us in countless ways at every turn. It delays us, rejects our creative endeavors, overlooks us for promotion, rewards idiots, and smashes our ambitions on its bleak, relentless shoals. And almost invariably we cann't complain about any of it. 
    We place such demands on our partners, and become so unreasonable around them, because we have faith that someone who understands obscure parts of us, whose presence solves so many of our woes, must somehow also be able to fix everything abou tour lives. We exaggerate the other's powers in a curious sort of homage - heard in adult life decades down the line - to a small child's awe at their own parents' apparently miraculous capacities.
    2016-07-21 09:17:25 1人喜欢 回应
  • 第202页
    Ordinary life rewards a practical, unintrospective outlook.  There's too little time and too much fear for anything else. We let ourselves be guided by an instinct for self-preservation: we push ourselves forwards, strike back when we're hit, turn the blame onto others, quell stray questions, and cleave closely to a flattering image of where we're headed. We have little option but to be relentlessly on our own side. 
    Only at those rare moments when the stars are out and nothing further will be needed from us until dawn can we loosen our hold on our ego for the sake of a more honest and less parochial perspective.
    2016-07-21 10:22:16 回应

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