Sunny对《Savage Feast》的笔记(2)

Savage Feast
  • 书名: Savage Feast
  • 副标题: Three Generations, Two Continents, and a Dinner Table; A Memoir With Recipes
  • 页数: 373
  • 出版社: Harper
  • 出版年: 2019-2-26
  • 第277页
    However, the ache in my hands eventually subsided to a dull burn, and the strain in my stomach eased as I learned to wield the pickax from the right part of my body. I swung, sank, pulled, and hefted, thens witched to a rake; then fell to my knees to gather the mound in which I'd bury the seeds. When I was done, theere were three long rows and I couldn't move. But my mind felt like water resting in a cool jug, exhausted into silence.
    引自第277页
    animals summon a sense of responsibility that even one's own well-being does not, and I was out of bed before the clock turned 6:01. Physical labor -espcially when food was involved - was a more effective emollient than rage. By the time I drove home after another shift the next day, I felt as if I were returning from another country. As if I had a secret.
    引自第277页
    Farm life, at first, seemed ritualistic:..
    引自第277页
    But then, like the haze that burns off on a hot day, that impression dispersed. After enough weekends, it began to seem like actually you could rely on very little routine. The notion of control was so laughable that, counterintuitively, the anxiety fell away. I had never gretted failure and lack of control in this way.
    引自第277页
    And then that impression went away. Farm life was ritualistic. And it was improvisational, too.
    引自第277页
    [285
    引自第277页
    A writer is never more blinded than when writing a memori. I just wanted desperately fto feel myself in competent hands. I was afraid. Afraid of never again being like the person I'd been. (Even as I wished to shed to much of that person.) Afraid because I didn't know whether drugs would make things better or worse. The longer I delayed, the analyst had said, the more freely my ailment would surge through my neurons, detaching from its cause until it was an ever more permanent part of me. It already was. Just by having experienced it once, I was 50% likelier to experience it again.
    引自第277页
    2019-04-15 10:48:56 回应
  • 第291页

    A restaurant kitchen is a place of great, joyous hate. Hate for the owners, who don't understand what the cooks need. Hate for the servers, who always show up at the wrong time. Hate for the diners, who have the temerity to actually order. And hate for one another - for Sasha, who never defended himself when Nikita and Misha flung insults and towels. I had feared, but expected, the abuse. What I ddin't expect was that being the WRiter would render me ineligible for it. I was steered clear of, and even that without hostility.

    P 308

    For all that I'd tried to disown, and had, I was their perfect alchemy: my father's mother's willfulness and perference of singing to socks full of cash, and my father's need for his own way, somewhere far from most perople; my mother's side's obsession with good marks, appearances, lots of noise, and never having enough. By now I had stood in front of many rooms, my first novel in hand. They always asked why you became a writer. An impossible question, but my four-headed answer floated up easily. Immigration gave me a million stories. Learning a new language at nine rather than zero left me astonished by what words could do. Because my people never expressed negative feelings directly (not a bequst of our totalitarian surroundings, but because they wished, above all, to show love, and what kind of love was it, they thought, if you disagreed openly?), I had to learn how to listen for what was meant rather than said, becoming acutely observant. That same love, however, meant I was never discouraged from speaking. A table of adults would fall silent so I could ask, or say. That last was the key: A fellow immigrant writer friend with a nearly identical background had only the first ghree, and had to work much harder to find the courage to put words on a page. I owed to my elders the career that had given them such alarm.

    P 335

    You get what you wanted, just not what you planned. My hunger has been good for my work, and a near calamity for everything else. As least I know not to rely on it.

    2019-04-15 10:59:20 回应

Sunny的其他笔记  · · · · · ·  ( 全部306条 )

Lifespan
1
Know My Name
8
The Years That Matter Most
3
Olive Kitteridge
1
She Said
4
The Nickel Boys
1
Trick Mirror
7
Nobody's Victim
1
American Predator
2
Bottle of Lies: The Inside Story of the Generic Drug Boom
1
Leaving the Witness
2
Writing to Persuade
1
Exhalation: Stories
4
Coders
3
The Orchid and the Dandelion
3
Sidewalk
1
Reviving Ophelia
1
Remember It!
1
The Beautiful Cure
4
Notorious RBG
1
Of Love & War
1
It's What I Do
1
American Like Me
1
Atomic Habits
1
Born a Crime
1
The White Darkness
1
How to Be a Good Creature
1
为什么精英这样用脑不会累
1
Eating with Your Anorexic
1
聆听父亲
1
Waiting
1
I'm Ok, You're Ok
1
乐未央
1
从星空到心灵
1
花儿与少年
1
美国故事
1
季羡林自传
1
没有一条道路是重复的
1
季羡林读书与做人
1
盖特露德
1
Wintergirls
1
我的阿勒泰
1
山河入梦
1
The Elephant in the Brain
1
Help Your Teenager Beat an Eating Disorder
1
旧时光的味道
1
I for Imagine
1
Ansel Adams
1
Brave Girl Eating
1
Almost Anorexic
1
The Back of the Napkin
1
The Shack
1
Every Last One
3
What I Talk About When I Talk About Running
2
8 Keys to Recovery from an Eating Disorder
1
Black Box Thinking
4
Tiny Beautiful Things
1
Bad Blood
1
How to Think
1
Us Against You
2
Beauty in the Broken Places
2
Better
2
How to Change Your Mind
1
Food Rules
1
The Neuroscientist Who Lost Her Mind
1
The Talent Code
1
Why You Eat What You Eat
1
Mind Over Mood
1
Girls & Sex
1
Thinking in Bets
4
The Culture Code
4
Skin in the Game
1
12 Rules for Life
1
Good Dog. Stay.
1
Exit West
8
The Checklist Manifesto
4
The Humans
1
Daring Greatly
1
Everything Happens for a Reason
4
Wild
2
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work
1
Nonviolent Communication
1
Complications
8
我的职业是小说家
2
Lab Girl
4
Stumbling on Happiness
8
Staying Connected To Your Teenager
3
The Microbiome Diet
4
The Economists' Diet
2
How to Raise an Adult
1
Untangled
3
Subliminal
2
Pre-Suasion
1
Boundaries
5
Boundaries with Teens When to Say Yes, How to Say No
2
By the Book
8
Why Buddhism is True
5
The Happiness Trap
1
Win Bigly
3
Altered Traits
3
Stay with Me
1
Light the Dark
3
Saint Anything
2
Misbehaving
4
You Can Do Anything
3
Little Fires Everywhere
2
The Glass Castle
1
Search Inside Yourself
1
Flowers for Algernon
5
Irresistible
3
Option B
1
另一个世界
3
Everybody Lies
1
When Breath Becomes Air
2
A Dog's Journey
2
Books for Living
1
Where You Go Is Not Who You'll Be
1
A Dog's Purpose
9
The Course of Love
4
Let's Take the Long Way Home
2
百年孤独
4
一个园丁的一年
3
冬牧场
3
菊与刀
1
青春期
1
Strange Stones
11
读库1205
2
羊道·深山夏牧场
3
父后七日
4
我们心中的怕和爱
1
身份的焦虑
1
打工旅行
2
我们为什么旅行
3
Factory Girls
4
灶下书
1
追随她的旅程
1
一个游荡者的世界
1
走夜路请放声歌唱
1