Sunny对《A Dog's Purpose》的笔记(9)

A Dog's Purpose
  • 书名: A Dog's Purpose
  • 作者: Cameron, W. Bruce
  • 页数: 320
  • 出版社: Forge Books
  • 出版年: 2010-7
  • 第177页
    When I woke up, I knew I was dying. There was a sense within me of a rising darkness, and I had faced this before, when I was named Toby and was in a small, hot room with Spike and some other barking dogs.
    ... and I hoped he wouldn't cry over my death. My purpose, my whole life, had been to love him and be with him, to make him happy. I didn't want to cause him any unhappiness now - in that way, I decided it was probably better than he wasn't here to see this, though I missed him so much at that moment the ache of it was as bad as the strange pains in my belly.
    I had the sense that the nice man was talking about death; there was a feeling of kind finality and peace emanating from him.
    ...the pain was gone - in fact, i felt like a puppy again, full of life and joy. I remembered feeling like this the first time I ever saw the boy, coming out of his house and running to me with his arms open wide. That made me think of diving after the boy during rescue, the fading light as I dove deeper, the way the thick water pushed against my body, just like now. I could no longer feel the boy's hands touching me; I could just feel the water on all sides: warm and gentle and dark.
    2017-01-15 00:49:00 回应
  • 第197页
    Jakob laughed and the sound of it was so peculiar, such a sad, tortured laugh, with no happiness in it at all.
    Playing in the ocean, I felt the thing that had such a tight clench on his heart loosen just a little.
    ... I marveled that I could remember my boy when he was little and also when he was a man. An ache overtook me then, a sharp stab of sadness that didn't go away until Jakob whistled me back to his side.
    2017-01-15 00:54:15 回应
  • 第222页
    Dogs are not allowed to choose where they live; my fate would be decided by people. But I nonetheless felt torn inside, conflicted.
    I could sense that Maya was grappling with the rising tide of emotion that sometimes led to a flood of tears. I wanted to comfort her and shoved my nose under her hand again.
    failure isn't an option if success is just a matter of more effort.
    The same old dark pain swirled around inside Jakob like a storm, and the anger left him as if blown away by a gust of wind.
    ...embraced me with an unguarded affection.
    p 226
    When I thought about Jakob, I realized that his cold dedication to Find helped me get over my separation from Ethan - there was no time for grieving; I had too much work to do. Maya, though, was more complex, and the way she loved me made me miss my boy. Not with the same sharp, painful ache in my chest but with a wistful sadness that often came to me as I was lying down for the night and rode with me into my dreams.
    2017-01-15 01:02:47 回应
  • 第234页
    I groaned at all this conversation. Humans were capable of so many amazing things, but too often they just sat making words, not doing anything.
    2017-01-15 01:04:53 回应
  • 第255页
    The unrestrained love flowing from Maya during those moments always nudged me into a deep, peaceful sleep.
    The aches in my bones were familiar to me; I'd felt the same way when I was Bailey and spent most of my time helping Grandpa do chores. Sights and sounds became dim, and this, too, was familiar.
    I wondered if Maya knew that they day was soon coming when I would no longer be with them. I only stood to reason that I would die, they way Emmet and Stella died, because that was what happened.
    As I lay in a patch of sun, pondering this, I realized that I had spent my life as a good dog. What I had learned from my first mother had led me to Ethan, and what I had learned from Ethan had enabled me to dive into those black waters, and find Geoffrey. Along the way, Jakob had taught me to Find and Show and I had helped save many people.
    This had to be why, when I left Ethan, I was reborn as Ellie - everything that I had done, everything that I had ever learned, had been leading up to being a good dog who saved people. It wasn't as much fun as being a doodle dog, but I now knew why these creatures, these human beings, had so fascinated me from the moment I saw them. It is because my fate was inextricably linked with theirs. Especially Ethan - that was the bond of a lifetime.
    Now that I had fulfilled my purpose, I felt sure I was at the end, that there would be no rebirth after this, and I was at peace with that. As wonderful as being a puppy could be, I wouldn't want to share it with anyone but the boy. Maya and Al had little Gabriella to distract them, making me sort of an afterthought in the family, except, of course, for Tinkerbell, who though I was the family.
    ...I knew where were were ging and was looking forward to the peace it would bring me. Maya stroked my head, and I closed my eyes. I wondered if there were anything I would have wanted to do one more time - Find? Swim in the Ocean? Stick my head out the car window? There was all wonderful things - I had done them all, though, and that was enough.
    I wagged my tail when they laid me on the familiar steel table. Maya was crying, whispering, "You're a good dog, "over and over, and it was her words, and the sens of her love, that I took with me when I felt the tiny prick by my neck and then was washed away by the wonderfully warm ocean waters.
    2017-01-15 01:14:02 回应
  • 第259页
    I understood how I would never have been with Ethan if, as Toby, I hadn't learned how to pen a gate, and from my days in the culvert learned that there was nothing to fear on the other side of the fence. With Ethan I learned about love and companionship, and felt I was truly accomplishing my purpose, just by accompanying him on his daily adventures. But Ethan also taught me how to rescue from the pond, and so when I was Ellie and learned ow to Find and Show I was able to save the little boy from the tunnel of water. I would not have been so good at work if I hadn't had the experience of being Ethan's dog - Jakob's cold distance would have been incomprehensible and painful to me.
    2017-01-15 01:20:32 回应
  • 第278页
    I was a dog who had learned to live among and serve humans as my sole purpose in life. Now, cut off from them, I was adrift. I had no purpose, no destiny, no hope.  Anyone spotting me slinking along the shores at that moment might mistake me for my timid, furtive first mother - that's how far back Victor's abandonment had thrown me. 
    P 281
    The approach fooled me, I passed so many houses, their streets bustling with cars and children, where my memory told me there should have been only fields.
    Humans can do that, take down old buildings and put up new ones, the way Grandpa built a new barn. They alter their environment to suit themselves, and all dogs can do is accompany them and, if they're lucky, go for car rides.
    P 283
    My stealth came to me so easily it was as if I'd never been taken from the culvert, as if I were still there with Sister and Fast and Hungry, learning from our first mother. Hunting was easy; trash cans were brimming with containers full of delicious scraps, and I avoided headlights and pedestrians with equal caution, hidden, dark, feral once more.
    2017-01-15 01:25:20 回应
  • 第289页
    Jasper's smell tracked right up to a large white trailer, a pile of grit and hay beneath it. His odors were painted everywhere and there was a new horse watching me with drowsy suspicion as I sniffed along the fence, but I was no longer interested in horses. Ethan, I could smell Ethan; he was everywhere. The boy must still live on the Farm!
    Never before in my entire existence had I felt the joyous excitement that coursed through me then: I was dizzy with it.
    2017-01-15 01:28:48 回应
  • 第297页
    Human motivation is unfathomable to dogs, so I wan't sure whey the two of us were separated, but I knew that when the time came, Ethan would Find me.
    p302
    He showed it to me and I sniffed it, picking up the ever so faint scent of another dog. Me, I realized. I was smelling me - it was a very odd sensation.
    He sat for a moment, lost in thought, and then looked at me. When he spoke, his voice was rough, and I felt a surge of strong emotions come from him - sadness and love and regret and mourning. "I guess maybe we'd better get you your own collar, Buddy. It wouldn't be right to make you try to live up to this one. Bailey... Bailey was a pretty special dog."
    p314
    I was a good dog. I had fulfilled my purpose. Lessons I had learned from being feral had taught me how to escape and how to hide from people when it was necessary, scavenging for good from trash containers. Being with Ethan had thought me love and had taught me my most important purpose, which was taking care of my boy. Jakob and Maya had taught me Find, Show, and most important of all, how to save people, and it was all of these things, everything I had learned as a dog, that had lead me to find Ethan and Hannah and to bring them both together, I understood it now, why I had lived so many times. I had to learn a lot of important skills and lessons, so that when the time came I could rescue Ethan, not from the pond but from the sinking despair of his own life.
    I craved the alone time with Ethan, when he would talk to me, his gait slow and careful on the uneven path. "What a great time we all had this week; didn't you have fun, Buddy?"
    "Why, hello, Bailey," he shocked me by saying, "How have you been? I've missed you, dog. "His hand groped for my fur. "Good dog, Bailey,"he said.
    It wasn't a a mistake. Somehow, he knew. These magnificent creatures, with their complex minds, were capable of so much more than a dog, and the sure conviction coming from him now let me know that he had put it all together. He was looking at me and seeing Bailey.
    I could not join him on his journey and did not know where it would lead him. People are vastly more complicated than dogs and served a much more important purpose. The job of a good dog was ultimately to be with them, remaining by their sides no matter what course their lives might take. All I could do now was offer him comfort, the assurance that as he left his life he was not alone but rather was tended by the dog who loved him more than anything in the whole world.
    I loyally remained right where I was, remembering the very first time I had ever seen the boy and then just now, the very last time - and all the times in between. The deep aching grief I knew I would feel would come soon enough, but at that moment mostly what I felt was peace, secure in the knowledge that by living my life the way I had, everything had come down to this moment.
    I had fulfilled my purpose.
    2017-01-15 01:44:53 回应

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