Read the Book While You are Young
If you are in your twenties when you saw the book, congrats!!! Some of the myth of the confused and lost age will be unraveled by it. While I wouldn't say you can find the answer to all your issues,it is a book that provides many 'ah-ha' moments to the young readers. Like one of Dr. Meg Jay's patient mentioned in her book: It's like swimming in the ocean, you don't know where you are heading and how deep is the water, you just keep swimming so you wouldn't drown. We all find ourselves stuck in that stage,I did,and she has successfully helped him find a solution for it.
I am familiar with the feeling of swimming in the ocean, we all are.Growing up is the process of stepping from known to the unknown. While some of us try really hard to find a life style that fits, possibly with fear in the process, others settle.Take me for example, there are certainly moments in my life when I doubt about my options:Am I cut out for the challenging job? Should I just quit when people say it is a wrong path for me?All my friends are working in the corporate, why would I be different?Should I keep dating that guy?What's the cost opportunity if I move to another city for a degree,or another country? Should I be a settler and stop wondering all together?
How I wish there is some mentor in my life to guide me through the uncertainties.But after failing in trying to fit into someone else's footsteps,I somehow have grown out of the phase of imitating and starting to carve a life myself. This is what Meg Jay called "Customized life". Why do we all want a customized bike while you can get another one off the rack and at cheaper price? No, we want something different,isn't it? The same with our lives.
I first got to know Meg Jay through a TED video titled 'Twenties were the new Thirties.' In her compelling speech,she talked particularly about her patients as a clinic psychologist and the insightful advice she provided touched my heart.As the speech went on, I was drawn into her attitude when she talks, her light southern accent, the medium pace when she gave the speech, the graceful and intelligent vibe from her, all made me wonder, who is she and how come everything she said sinks into my mind? After that, I checked her website and got to know that she is a specialist in twentysomething and instantly bought her book from amazon.And there comes my journey.
I wasn't particularly interested in the 'self-help' category. In fact, I have been deliberately staying away from the Dale Carnegies as far as I could.And Dr.Jay's book couldn't be further away from cliche's of the genre. As a twentysomething myself, I want good stories and convincing scientific theories. The Defining Decade happens to fall into the ideal guidance book I wanted. As an experienced therapist,her topics are all based on good stories from her twentysomething patients. While everyone is different, at some point I found myself in one of the patient's shoes: I was the girl always calling my Dad and my friends to 'borrow their frontal lobe' to solve issues at work. I was anti-social from time to time,sticking with my strong links and wasn't paying too much attention to the weak ties which may change my life.It took me very long time to come to the senses and dig for my 'unthought known'.I'm confused with choosing a partner,a career, a life, I take baby steps when I make life decision. I wonder about 'what ifs',but I am scared of trying.
All in all, I connect with the book,and so is my best friend Chloe who happens to be on the same life pace.We need a kick in the head to keep us going, and it came in the right time.Though I'd appreciate it if I read it 3 years ago,but fate is tricky and 26 is not too late:P
I am familiar with the feeling of swimming in the ocean, we all are.Growing up is the process of stepping from known to the unknown. While some of us try really hard to find a life style that fits, possibly with fear in the process, others settle.Take me for example, there are certainly moments in my life when I doubt about my options:Am I cut out for the challenging job? Should I just quit when people say it is a wrong path for me?All my friends are working in the corporate, why would I be different?Should I keep dating that guy?What's the cost opportunity if I move to another city for a degree,or another country? Should I be a settler and stop wondering all together?
How I wish there is some mentor in my life to guide me through the uncertainties.But after failing in trying to fit into someone else's footsteps,I somehow have grown out of the phase of imitating and starting to carve a life myself. This is what Meg Jay called "Customized life". Why do we all want a customized bike while you can get another one off the rack and at cheaper price? No, we want something different,isn't it? The same with our lives.
I first got to know Meg Jay through a TED video titled 'Twenties were the new Thirties.' In her compelling speech,she talked particularly about her patients as a clinic psychologist and the insightful advice she provided touched my heart.As the speech went on, I was drawn into her attitude when she talks, her light southern accent, the medium pace when she gave the speech, the graceful and intelligent vibe from her, all made me wonder, who is she and how come everything she said sinks into my mind? After that, I checked her website and got to know that she is a specialist in twentysomething and instantly bought her book from amazon.And there comes my journey.
I wasn't particularly interested in the 'self-help' category. In fact, I have been deliberately staying away from the Dale Carnegies as far as I could.And Dr.Jay's book couldn't be further away from cliche's of the genre. As a twentysomething myself, I want good stories and convincing scientific theories. The Defining Decade happens to fall into the ideal guidance book I wanted. As an experienced therapist,her topics are all based on good stories from her twentysomething patients. While everyone is different, at some point I found myself in one of the patient's shoes: I was the girl always calling my Dad and my friends to 'borrow their frontal lobe' to solve issues at work. I was anti-social from time to time,sticking with my strong links and wasn't paying too much attention to the weak ties which may change my life.It took me very long time to come to the senses and dig for my 'unthought known'.I'm confused with choosing a partner,a career, a life, I take baby steps when I make life decision. I wonder about 'what ifs',but I am scared of trying.
All in all, I connect with the book,and so is my best friend Chloe who happens to be on the same life pace.We need a kick in the head to keep us going, and it came in the right time.Though I'd appreciate it if I read it 3 years ago,but fate is tricky and 26 is not too late:P
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