"You've read the Symposium?"
Maurice had not,and did not add that he had explored Martial.
"It's all in there-not meat for babes,of course,but you ought to read it,Read it this vac."
No more was said at the time,but he was free of another subject,and one that he had never mentioned to any living soul,He hadn't known it could be mentioned,and when Durham did so in the middle of the sunlit court a breath of liberty touched him. (查看原文)
"I knew you read the Symposium in the vac,"he said in a low voice.
Maurice felt uneasy.
"Then you understand—without me saying more—"
"How do you mean?"
Durham could not wait.People were all around they,but with eyes that had gone intensely blue he whispered,"I love you." (查看原文)
"You might give me a chance instead of avoiding me—I only want to discuss."
"We've discussed the whole evening."
"I mean the Symposium,like the ancient Greeks."
"Oh Hall,don't be so stupid—you ought to know that to be alone with you hurts me.No,please don't reopen.It's over.It's over."He went into the other room and began to undress."Forgive this discoutesy,but I simply can't—my nerves are all nohow after three weeks of this."
"So are mine,"cried Maurice.
"Poor,poor chap!"
"Durham,I'm in Hell."
"Oh,you'll get out,It's only the Hell of disgust.You've never done anything to be ashamed of,so you don't know what's really Hell."
Maurice gave a cry of pain.It was so unmistakable that Durham,who was about to close the door between them,said,"Very well,I'II discuss if you like.Wh... (查看原文)
'I mean,' said Risley, 'oh how clearly I mean that the cutlet influences your subconscious lives, and I your conscious, and so I am not only more impressive than the cutlet but more important. Your Dean here, who dwells in Medieval Darkness and wishes you to do the same, pretends that only the subconscious, only the part of you that can be touched without your knowledge is important, and daily he drops soporific - ' (查看原文)
He believed that he believed and felt genuine pain when anything he was accustomed to met criticism-the pain that masquerades among the middle classes as Faith. It was not Faith, being inactive. It gave him no support, no wider outlook. It didn't exist till the opposition touched it, why it ached like a useless nerve. (查看原文)
He realized that he had no sense of Christ's existence or of His goodness, and should be positively sorry if there was such a person. His dislike of Christianity grew and became profound. In ten days he gave up communicating, in three weeks he cut out all the chapels he dared. (查看原文)
He did not communicate on Easter Sunday, and supposed the row would come ten, as Durham's case. But no one took any notice, for the suburbs no longer exact Christianity. This disgusted him; it made him look at society with new eyes. Did society, while professing to be so moral and sensitive, really mind anything? (查看原文)
They became a cloud of dust, a stench, and a roar to the world, but the air they breathed was pure, and all the noise they heard was the long drawn cheer of the wind. They cared for no one, they were outside humanity, and death, had it come, would only have continued their pursuit of a retreating horizon. (查看原文)
