The privileging of romantic relationships FROM chapter 1

While we weaken friendships by expecting too little of them, we undermine romantic relationships by expecting too much of them.
The privileging of romantic relationships, thoroughly documented by scholars, pervades not just our social norms but also the law; to give an example, Americans can extend health insurance and Social Security benefits to spouses but not to the closest of friends.
Widening the frame allows us to see that today’s discrete categories and hierarchies are neither innate nor universal: Marriage doesn’t have to rank above friendship. Love doesn’t automatically involve lust. Romantic and platonic feelings aren’t always easy to distinguish.
But it’s easy to mistake what is familiar for what is wise.
By asking so much of one relationship, marriages today are like handblown glass: exquisite, but fragile.
 It’s a safety net: if one person is your everything and the relationship ends, you stand to lose it all—your confidant, best friend, sexual partner, professional coach, and more—all at once.
Tilly considers a romantic relationship to be supplemental—“the cherry on the cake.”