出版社: Atria Books
副标题: Moving from Rewards and Punishments to Love and Reason
出版年: 2007年
页数: 272 页
定价: 127.0
装帧: 平装
ISBN: 9780743487504
内容简介 · · · · · ·
Most parenting guides begin with the question "How can we get kids to do what they're told?" and then proceed to offer various techniques for controlling them. In this truly groundbreaking book, nationally respected educator Alfie Kohn begins instead by asking, "What do kids need - and how can we meet those needs?" What follows from that quetion are ideas for working with child...
Most parenting guides begin with the question "How can we get kids to do what they're told?" and then proceed to offer various techniques for controlling them. In this truly groundbreaking book, nationally respected educator Alfie Kohn begins instead by asking, "What do kids need - and how can we meet those needs?" What follows from that quetion are ideas for working with children rather than doing things to them.
One basic need all children have, Kohn argues, is to be loved unconditionally, to know that they will be accepted even if they screw up or fall short. Yet conventional approaches to parenting such as punishments (including "time-outs"), rewards (including positive reinforcement), and other forms of control teach children that they are loved only when they please us or impress us. Kohn cites a body of powerful, and largely unknown, research detailing the damage caused by leading children to believe they must earn our approval. That's precisely the message children derive from common discipline techniques, even though it's not the message most parents intend to send.
More than just another book about discipline, though, Unconditional Parenting addresses the ways parents think about, feel about, and act with their children. It invites them to question their most basic assumptions about raising kids while offering a wealth of practical strategies for shifting from "doing to" to "working with" parenting - including how to replace praise with the unconditional support that children need to grow into healthy, caring, responsible people. This is an eye-opening, paradigm-shattering book that will reconnect readers to their own best instincts and inspire them to become better parents.
作者简介 · · · · · ·
Alfie Kohn is the author of nine previous books, including Punished by Rewards and The Schools Our Children Deserve, that have helped to shape the thinking of parents and educators across the country and abroad. He lectures widely and lives (actually) with his family in the Boston are and (virtually) at www.alfiekohn.org.
喜欢读"UNCONDITIONAL PARENTING Moving from Rewards and Pu"的人也喜欢 · · · · · ·
UNCONDITIONAL PARENTING Moving from Rewards and Pu的书评 · · · · · · ( 全部 57 条 )
我眼中的“无条件养育” ——浅谈亲子教育中的道与术
被有条件养育大的我们
我喜欢这种"偏激"的教育方式
蜀道难,难于上青天,吾将上下而求索
孩子需要的和我们给予的可有并不一致。让孩子感觉到爱。
没条件的生活更简单美好
你为孩子好,还是为自己省事儿?
这篇书评可能有关键情节透露
这是一本颠覆我教育观念的书。 虽然也许有点过犹不及,可如果“不过”,何以能在以“掌控”为主流教育理念的世界里激起浪花?! 作者并没有给出一个好的答案,甚至连一个明确的答案都没有。 一开始,我不喜欢这个书名,“无条件”这个词让我反感。还好作者一再申明,他所说... (展开)> 更多书评 57篇
论坛 · · · · · ·
在这本书的论坛里发言这本书的其他版本 · · · · · · ( 全部4 )
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天津教育出版社 (2012)8.5分 971人读过
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中国致公出版社 (2021)7.9分 52人读过
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Atria Books (2006)8.7分 27人读过
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订阅关于UNCONDITIONAL PARENTING Moving from Rewards and Pu的评论:
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0 有用 Yiiiingzi 2015-04-30 00:13:21
车轱辘话翻来倒去的说,真的很佩服老外。不过这个概念我非常接受
0 有用 小巫WeeWitch 2010-03-21 21:15:59
One of the best parenting books I've ever read. Answered most of my questions regarding discipline. I have changed my old practices and need to revise my previous writings.
0 有用 color_of_wind 2015-06-08 16:02:24
一,作为父母,无条件地爱孩子,是由于ta是你的孩子,而不是由于ta做了哪些可以让你自豪的事。这种无条件的爱,既不是溺爱,也不是对你的孩子市恩市义(所谓养育之恩,即属市恩市义)。二,做出恰当决定的能力需要从幼年一点点培养、历练,并让孩子了解每一项决定都与责任的承担有关。学习做出恰当决定的途径,恰恰是通过做决定本身,而非通过听从他人指导。三,要有勇气、有能力面对和质疑自己的养育经历以及被养育的经历。是... 一,作为父母,无条件地爱孩子,是由于ta是你的孩子,而不是由于ta做了哪些可以让你自豪的事。这种无条件的爱,既不是溺爱,也不是对你的孩子市恩市义(所谓养育之恩,即属市恩市义)。二,做出恰当决定的能力需要从幼年一点点培养、历练,并让孩子了解每一项决定都与责任的承担有关。学习做出恰当决定的途径,恰恰是通过做决定本身,而非通过听从他人指导。三,要有勇气、有能力面对和质疑自己的养育经历以及被养育的经历。是的,人通常不愿意质疑自己、质疑自己亲近的人,尤其是自己父母。但谁都不是完人,包括你和你父母,所以,只要用心,一定会找到可以改进的地方,使自己变得更好并尝试做更好的父母。 (展开)
0 有用 color_of_wind 2015-06-08 16:02:24
一,作为父母,无条件地爱孩子,是由于ta是你的孩子,而不是由于ta做了哪些可以让你自豪的事。这种无条件的爱,既不是溺爱,也不是对你的孩子市恩市义(所谓养育之恩,即属市恩市义)。二,做出恰当决定的能力需要从幼年一点点培养、历练,并让孩子了解每一项决定都与责任的承担有关。学习做出恰当决定的途径,恰恰是通过做决定本身,而非通过听从他人指导。三,要有勇气、有能力面对和质疑自己的养育经历以及被养育的经历。是... 一,作为父母,无条件地爱孩子,是由于ta是你的孩子,而不是由于ta做了哪些可以让你自豪的事。这种无条件的爱,既不是溺爱,也不是对你的孩子市恩市义(所谓养育之恩,即属市恩市义)。二,做出恰当决定的能力需要从幼年一点点培养、历练,并让孩子了解每一项决定都与责任的承担有关。学习做出恰当决定的途径,恰恰是通过做决定本身,而非通过听从他人指导。三,要有勇气、有能力面对和质疑自己的养育经历以及被养育的经历。是的,人通常不愿意质疑自己、质疑自己亲近的人,尤其是自己父母。但谁都不是完人,包括你和你父母,所以,只要用心,一定会找到可以改进的地方,使自己变得更好并尝试做更好的父母。 (展开)
0 有用 Yiiiingzi 2015-04-30 00:13:21
车轱辘话翻来倒去的说,真的很佩服老外。不过这个概念我非常接受
0 有用 小巫WeeWitch 2010-03-21 21:15:59
One of the best parenting books I've ever read. Answered most of my questions regarding discipline. I have changed my old practices and need to revise my previous writings.